Tuesday 19 June 2007

"THE BURROW BUGLE" - 19 June

ben trovato writes:

Things are a bit laid back in the burrow at the moment. Since his return from Bella Italia, anticant has been loafing around reading old novels and warbling snatches of "O Sole Mio" and "Nessun Dorma" until the Beadle complains of lack of sleep. When [if ever] serious blogging will be resumed in the arena is not known - although anticant has lately been cackling to himself and going off into sniggering fits as he mutters pungent phrases for his "Good Riddance to Blair" valedictory post now in gestation for next week's long-awaited departure.

Equipment has been a source of bother, as modern technology always is. New multifunction printer/scanners are required, and identifying the 'best buy' is time-consuming [settled now in favour of a new Canon model]. Worse, anticant's automatic transmission car has developed a very user-unfriendly fault, and so a trade-in is on the cards, with all the attendant stress that involves [changing cars being as severe a life crisis as swapping homes, jobs or partners].

But the Snug remains open and welcoming as always, and the bar is well-stocked - the threatened raid during anticant's absence by transatlantic kayaking musical marauders not having materialised. So do drop in, folks, for a noggin and a gossip.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ah.....yes............time for a Little Something before lunch......those were the days,my friend........

zola a social thing said...

LavenderB : "Time for a little something"?
Is this a comment on your fellow adventurers ? Italians?
Please write more we would love to feel free to comment.

Anticant : Last time I visited the Snug-bar the vodka was... well, how can one say .... not up to scratch. I did send a complaint to the EU. I hear they agreed with me.

anticant said...

You are commenting pretty freely as it is! LavvyB is far too much of a lady to say "Time for a big something before lunch" and her male companions - one of them, anyway - are far too modest to even hint that anything big might have been on offer. It was an Italian lakeside terrasce, dammit - not a steamy Finnish sauna.

As for the Snug vodka, the Beadle assures me that our patented Burrow Brand is always prepared using only the purest turpentine. So far as we are aware, no EU inspectors have visited us recently - unless trousers is an undercover agent.

Bodwyn Wook said...

SPARE Me the phenolic seepage you lot seem to take on board
for 'vodka'!

IS The /gin/ safe around there?

HOWDY, All -- Grampa Wook is right now (between hailstorms!) writing a grant to the state of Minnesota to get money for recording- and editing-equipment for his audio history-projects. It is all in connexion with our 2008 sesquicentennial, and sorting through all of the fool technology now available /is/ a young chap's game -- thank Goddess! for a young & geeksome son-in-law called Phillip, as /I/ find it all no-end irksome and positively cannot keep 'bytes' separated from 'bit-rates'.

MOTORCARS, Likewise, are a pain in the nuts! as we say hereabouts -- as I just now begin to step over the threshold into old age, I find frankly the sheer /crudity/ of physical things vastly disappointing -- and, now, increasingly, just plain annoying. A muffler came adrift in the old van in town the other day & I took resentment at the disgusting /presumption/. As, equally, I cat-like do not care for grimy paws, I simply drove the son-of-a-bitch screeching home in a rain of sparks, and the dirty bastard finally submitted to Grandpa, gave up the idiopathic God-damned resistance and fell nicely off in the farm-yard, where I then could pick it nicely up WITHOUT any un-due incovenience to my self, although I do roundly begrudge as well the forty seconds or so it took to carry the damned thing to the tip -- these effing time-wasters add up!

SO If was you, I should flog the motor to one of the younger and sillier-looking mahometans in his yard-wide pink silk turban of ostrich feathers -- and take out a 'bus pass. Only I expect the 'buses ain't what they used to be there either, eh?

JESUS Christ, I detest /objects/!

NONCELY, Wook

anticant said...

Emmett, wish we could do without a car - but it's essential for shopping. We couldn't carry stuff to and fro on buses [which aren't close anyway], and taxis are hopelessly unreliable. One never knows how long they will take to arrive - or whether they will arrive at all! So a small 'about-town' car is needed until I become too decrepit to venture out at all.....

What you country bumpkins don't realise is that Big City life is regressing rapidly backwards. Far too many people and inadequate services, and on the human side almost no-one can be relied on to do what they have contracted for.

When I hear those dread words "No Problem" my heart sinks into my boots, as I know that a major cock-up is impending.

BTW, if you want a birds-eye view of British idiocies, read Ken Frost's wonderful blog 'Nanny Knows Best' [link from anticant's arena].'

Anonymous said...

That will explain why The Boldscot's oft repeated phrase 'Nae probs' resulted in the eyes glazing over.

Anonymous said...

And ain't that the truth.

Anonymous said...

I'm no undercover agent, trust me.

Then again if I'm finding myself saying "trust me", it implies that there's some reason not to.

I'll be too busy inspecting the bottom of a glass or two of Erdinger Dunkl to be doing any undercover work mind you.

Merkin said...

Have one for me, big man.

Anonymous said...

Will do merk. I'll reply to your email eventually, but thanks for it :)

Anonymous said...

Ah! Having just received a copy of the EU Parliament's decisions regarding vodka, we realise why Zola is spoiling for a fight to the Finnish.

The best remedy appears to be for the Beadle to sample each newly opened bottle of Burrow Brand. So far it is passing the test, as the worthy Beadle consumes almost half each bottle before passing it as OK. His snores then reverberate around the Snug for a couple of hours, during which the burrow is all too vulnerable to bootlegging raids by naked kayakers.

As for the burrow gin, it has long been known among the cognoscenti as "Wook's Ruin".

Anticant is sticking to rum punch.

Anonymous said...

SO.
The Beadle is pissing the test.
And Anticant is Punch-drunk.
Again.
You may well have shocked even The Naked Kayaker.

Merkin said...

AntiCant is stickin' to Rum Punch?

ughghughughaaaah

Excuse me while I choke on my Vodka Martini, Brandy, WhiskyMac, Bardolino and the contents of a Threshers branch.

Revisionism, can't beat it.

Anonymous said...

Revisionism ?
Well, that is a new name for it..........

zola a social thing said...

BTW : If you lot can forget vodka for a moment and get to more serious things we find the EU reigning cats and dogs and dammit horsemeat next.

Off now to ferment me spuds.

Anonymous said...

Rumours : LavenderBlue and Anticant are going to Bancock in Thighland soon. But there seemed to be, our reliable source confirmed, another planning a related quest. News is coming in all the time on this hot topic.

Anonymous said...

I simply cannot abide gossip.

Anonymous said...

I'll have double noggins instead.

Anonymous said...

"double noggins instead"?