Wednesday, 23 May 2007

THE BOX IS OPENED

Lavenderblue having successfully begged mercy for the Trousers twins, everyone was sitting around the Snug enjoying a potent nightcap – treble Pink Gins for Dame Barbara – when a bedraggled Beadle lurched in through the door, and recounted his adventures at the Duckpond. He had been flabbergasted to find that the ringleader of Lavvyblue’s and his abduction was the burrow’s newly appointed Chief Cashier, Paul Wolfie, who hysterically accused them of stealing the keys to his precious box which, he said, contained the source of his malign power. Although they had protested their innocence, he had stormed off into the forest swearing revenge. Lavender had then made her escape, and the Beadle had been released by Miss Marple.

That lady herself now arrived, and triumphantly produced the bunch of keys from her handbag. It was unanimously agreed to open the Box, which Ben and the Beadle carried down from Wolfie’s room. It was made of ornately carved wood, strengthened with iron bands, and upon its lid was inscribed in golden letters: “I HOLD THE MYSTERY OF THE UNIVERSE”.

As Anticant cautiously turned the key, everyone craned forward. He lifted the lid.

The Box was empty.

4 comments:

zola a social thing said...

The box was empty but nature abhors a vacuum. The suction was incredible and the magical powers of the box caused the room to hum and the inhabitants were spell bound. The box sucked all the evils from the wicked bunch.
What was left was a different bunch all together and it was a wonder to behold. The box had cast away the sins of the worldly buch and what was left was ................

anticant said...

Business as usual at the burrow!

Welcome back to the cosy unmagicked Snug everyone. Ben is replenishing the bar and his joke book. The Beadle is polishing up the brasses and giving the garden an overdue Spring makeover. Dame Barbara has reluctantly departed, as her inroads into the dwindling gin stock were too heavy a drain on Anticant's pocket. Miss Marple has returned home after happily clocking up another mystery solved. The Trousers Twins also went home, still arguing about mistaken identitity. Wolfie was ignominiously sacked, after vainly demanding a huge payoff for his dubious services. Lavvyblue's knickers fly proudly aloft from the flagpole, and Zola's kayak is anchored at the jetty while he samples his favourite brews in the Snug....

Have a great Bank Holiday weekend, folks.

PS We have just received a job application from a Master Harry Potter, but there are no vacancies at present.

Dumbledore said...

That was a highly commendable ending, Zola - quite brilliant, in fact.

I understand that you are a teacher, and I wonder if you would be interested in accepting a post as junior magus at Hogwarts?

zola a social thing said...

Let it be known that this Zola owns a tee-shirt with SLYTHERIN written across the front in big letters. I wear it often.
BTW I have never taught anything but I am regarded as a letcherer ay very high levels of legitimation.
So there !