Friday, 6 July 2007

THE BEADLE SAYS NO.

After watching this, the Beadle has decided not to apply for a post as a big game warden in Africa. He feels safer patrolling the burrow boundaries, naked kayakers and all.

22 comments:

zola a social thing said...

Me suspects that that Beadle of the Parish would not be able to prevent a decent gooseing in the park. Anti take care your beadle is not fit for porpoise.
Those geese are wild me old mate.

Anyway good to see our infamous grumpyAunt rejoining the prey.

Anonymous said...

A sentimental Anti
found lurkin in the pantry
Big bad beadle on patrol
But Merkin he is on a roll.

Who can it be, who can it be
Cried out our Antiscam
me sausage
me sausage
But the Merkin on a roll.

That Beadle could not even protect a sausage from those backbenchers.

ben trovato said...

Don't be so hard on the poor old Beadle, you meanies. Would YOU want to be gored by wild buffalo or mauled by lions?

zola a social thing said...

That is exactly what that Beadle needs or, if not, a being set upon hard and firm as a goose does best.

Fuck me after Maggi Thatch what can be said more? Mauled by lions?

Give me Ms Greer anyday.
At least she is a 2metre high icon with an excuse. She was born somewhere down and under.
Ah the swinging 60s ---- where was the Beadle of the Parish then we ask????!!!

zola a social thing said...

"Nature red in tooth and claw"?

Is this the Hobbes within Anticant?

How beastly?

But no. My sources say that the Beadle was the beastly fucker of that cow ( famous in the SUN newspaper)and the Beadle is now on the run.
Anticant sending off messages everywhere to calm it all down.

Investigations continue however concerning the goats. One report came in concerning red herrings and even domesticated birds. But these are still mere rumours it seems for now anyway.

A private company has been employed to investigate more and we are told that a report will be made by LBS Consult.AB.

But the safety of various species are, it is said, "at-risk".

The Beadle asks for support here.
Anticant is expected to protect his own protector.
The press are hot on this story.

the burrow beadle said...

There is no such thing as "a decent gooseing in the park".

All gooseings in the park are indecent.

No gooseings in the park!

By Order

anticant said...

As you see, the Beadle remains at his post and is exercising vigilance to prevent the flagpole hoisting of Germaine Greer's bras or Maggie Thatcher's stockings - not to mention Rebekah Wade's unmentionables.

Anonymous said...

As for the 'reporters 'on the film....bunch of fucking sickos,each and every one.a little bit like fox hunting and their supporters...........

lavenderblue said...

oops, that was me....unlike some, I put my name to it.

Barber-Surgeon said...

Are you game, warden?
I'm on fire, chief.

zola a social thing said...

The fox has left its lair with a hey....ja...a hayjah, ah ,ha,ha,ha,ha and a ging gang google too.

Last Tango in Paris is up for release again. Reviewers are already saying that this is the way to "butter up a good woman". ( Lavender : if you respond to this factual posting please remember that Antipanties is sensitive about these "things".)

Anonymous said...

Please remember that Mr AntiCant has respectable readers of this blog.
Show some respect please.
If only for the young and needy.

Even Ms Melons is nervous to respond on this wicked site.

the burrow beadle said...

No buttering-up in the burrow.

By Order

Judge anticant said...

As this cinematographic performance has led to some disgraceful misbehaviour and bad language in the back row, there will be no more film shows in the burrow until further notice.

By Order

david attenborough said...

As I am always saying, humans are the worst behaved species. See my next film: 'Secrets of the Snug'.

david starkey said...

And see my next TV series 'The Seven Plagues of Anticant'.

the burrow beadle said...

And my forthcoming memoirs 'Burrowings of a Beadle'.

lavenderblue said...

You promised me you would keep our secrets ...........

the burrow beadle said...

Fear not, Miss Lavender, Beadles are the Soul of Discretion, unless they choose otherwise.

Anonymous said...

I'll give that Beadle two choices :-
a) slim, and
b) fuck all

Phentermine said...

Thanks for interesting article.

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