A RIGHT ROYAL RESPONSE

While on a state visit to England, George W. Bush meets the Queen and proclaims, "As I'm the President of America, I'm thinking of changing how my great country is referred to. It should be called a kingdom."

The Queen replies, "I'm sorry, Mr. Bush, but to be a kingdom, you have to have a king in charge, and you're not a king."

George Bush thinks for a moment and then asks, "How about a principality, then?"

The Queen replies, "Again, to be a principality, you have to be a prince, and you're not a prince, Mr. Bush."

Bush thinks long and hard and comes up with another option. "How about an empire?"

Getting a little annoyed, the Queen replies, "Sorry again, Mr. Bush, but to be an empire you must have an emperor in charge, and you are not an emperor."

Before Bush could utter another word, the Queen offers solace:

"Don't worry, Mr. Bush, under your leadership the USA is perfect as a country."

LINGUISTIC KNICKERTWIST

With Szwagier, Yellow Duck and Zola all keeping a wary eye open for burrow solecisms, we have been hesitating whether or not to post this one - but have decided to take the plunge:


A linguistics professor was lecturing the class.

"In English," he explained, "a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative."

"However," the professor continued, "there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

Immediately, a voice from the back of the room piped up: "Yeah..... right...."